Little Piper Pics

I might possible have tooo many pictures of this little sweetie! Well, that's a lie. I crave more! She makes so many people so happy. She is so so happy and smiley. She observes EVERYTHING when she is in a room. She isn't scared to be held by others besides Zoey. She seems nervous about Zoey. She still doesn't have a schedule but she does well to go with the flow. I love and hate seeing her grown day by day. I would bottle her up if I could. 

Logan 4 1/2

I am getting emotional just thinking of what I would write for Logan. It's been a hard few weeks with Logan. He has been kind of mad at me and Jake. At least that's how we have felt. Jake and I have been so sad and stressed about it not knowing what to do to help him be more positive and happy. As Zoey stayed at Grandma's the other night, we got Gigi to ourselves and stayed up late watching Batman with him. The next morning Gigi was his sweet little self that I love. He even said "I want you to lay with me mommy" and wanted me to return after getting the baby down for a nap to be with him. He has been saying Thank You a lot this weekend! There he is.......that boy that loves being close to his momma! I take some of the blame. I always have a baby in my arms and something to do. I get why he's been angry. I know he probably is so frustrated to not be the baby of the family still. I am so lucky that he loves Piper so much. I need to remember how much Logan thrives on one on one time. I hope I can be a better momma to him. I often just miss him so much. He is just growing up so fast. He is BEAUTIFUL! Big brown eyes and blonde hair, freckles on his nose and the cutest mannerisms as he talks. I love him so so much. I hope I can always help him know that!

He loves his little street of friends! He has Mavais (his on and off again girlfriend), Jeremiah, Jackson, Annie, Emily, Katie, Elliott, Liam and of course Charly and Zoey. He rides his razor scooter like a pro and isn't afraid to go knock on doors looking for friends to play with. "Is the boy here?" is how he asked if Liam could play one day. He doesn't really ever remember his friends names.... just that they are his friends and he has fun with them!

Some things about Logan at 4 1/2:

He doesn't like crazy rides and roller coasters
He still loves yogurt and cereal and string cheese and now gets them mostly himself. He also loves chocolate milk.
He whines almost anytime you ask him to do something. We really really hope this is a phase!!!!!
He still has a lot of accidents. We really really hope this is a phase too!!!!!
Him and Mavias are getting married and plan "to stay in Utah and have a wedding cake with strawberries". They had a date this weekend building a slug house in her back yard
He adores Piper and kisses her non stop but never ever holds her.
He loves the HULK and the Avengers
He can tell you his address
He can write his letters but never write them next to each other
He doesn't really care to color well
He changes his clothes a million times a day

Logan was repeating the 1st article of faith to us around 4th of July time and said "In his son Jesus Christ and in the....latter day America" He couldnt help but laugh and he didn't really like that!

Sometimes I Cry

by Annie Reneau

Sometimes I cry for you, little one.

Sometimes I cry because the world is so big and you’re so small, and I worry—Oh, do I worry—aboutYOUR smallness in this big world.

Sometimes I cry because you’re so big and I’m so small, and the bigger you get to me, the smaller I get to you, and I worry—Lord, how I worry—about my smallness in your big world.

Sometimes I cry because this love is too big and my heart is too small, and a bursting heart feels—strangely, painfully—an awful lot like a breaking one.

Sometimes I cry because I’m overwhelmed by the beauty of you.

Sometimes I cry because I’m overwhelmed by the weight of you.

Sometimes I cry because in thePROCESS of gaining you, I gave up a version of me, and though I wouldn’t change that even if I could, sometimes I miss me desperately.

Sometimes I cry because your skin is so soft, and your eyes are so bright, and your soul is so new, and your heart is so open, and I’m sad. I’m sad that your innocence will crumble from experiences brutal and necessary, because you are as painfully human as the rest of us.

Sometimes I cry because you need help in ways that I can’t help you, and helplessness as a parent feels—strangely, surprisingly—an awful lot like sheer terror.

Sometimes I cry because as a mother I have no choice but to put on my big-girl panties every day, and both of those things—having no choice and big-girl panties—can be really, really uncomfortable.

Sometimes I cry because I am so unbelievablyTIRED—not sleepy, but tired—that I can’t do anything else.

Sometimes I cry because I hear God in your giggles.

Sometimes I cry because your veryEXISTENCE evokes a joy so profound that smiles and laughter can’t quite reach it.

Sometimes I cry because this blessing is so big and my cup is so small and the overflow has to go somewhere.

Sometimes I cry because all of these things—the love, the worry, the sadness, the beauty, the bursting, the big-girl panties, the blessing—it’s all too much to take. Just too, too much.

So sometimes I cry for you. And for me. And for this big world. And for a thousand other terrible, wonderful, desperate, beautiful reasons that you won’t understand until you’re a parent.

Sometimes I cry for you, little one. Big, cleansing tears.

The Bird Funeral

There once was a bird that died and became the cherished belonging of Zoeys... So cherished that she couldn't bare to part with it. The bird was named Angel (naturally) and because of her attachment Charly and Emily decided throwing Angel would be the best way to let go. The funeral was a beautiful tribute to this little bird and a tribute to real friendships and love that exists in our back yard. Everyone dressed in black and white (even me Jake, Jess, Mom, and Piper), words were shared and a grave was properly made. It meant the world to Zoey to see Angel so loved, when really it was Zoey that was really so loved. 

Dance Recital Time!

So I go in and watch Zoey dance in her class sometimes. She often seems bored and distracted and not really all that good. ha. As a lover of dance I have often been disappointed to see this. At her age I am pretty sure I was rocking it in class!! haha. As the recital approached I kind of braced myself for a  semi disappointed performances from Zoey. Don't get me wrong...she was still pumped and excited to get in a costume (even though she REALLY wanted to wear a shirt under it for itchiness), and excited to be on the stage. Jess and I had so much fun getting Zoey and Charly ready and doing make up and curling hair and just reliving so much of our childhood with our own girls. That alone was touching and special.
So, to get to the point here.... Zoey comes out on stage and she just rocks it! She knows every step and does such a perfect job! I can't just sit there and enjoy her dancing....no.... I am just bawling. There is my little girl putting me in my place of my low expectations for her. She shined and I was soo proud and so so sorry that I doubted her. One thing I should know about Zoey is that she works hard for success. She was only bored and silly in dance class because she had already learned and mastered her dance.
  I am so proud to be her momma. So so proud of the lesson she constantly teaches me in my life. Thanks for a truely memorable performance and lesson my dear Zoey.

Gigi and His Baby

This boy can't stopping kissing his little sister! Piper thinks he's hilarious! I can just see the special bond these two have and can't wait to see it bloom even more as they grow